As a little girl, I used to long to get married, just so I could design my wedding dress and look somewhat like Disney characters’ glamorous ladies, with the big ball gown, tiny waist and full round bust. I never stopped to think for a second whether the idea of the perfect dress I had as a kid would suit my taste and body shape as an adult. Luckily, when I started looking for my ideal wedding dress, the idea of a Disney dress quickly evaporated from my mind. I mean they are beautiful on the dolls on Disney channel, but it just won’t fit my body structure, and even if it did, I would like to think my style has evolved since my Disney days!
Another myth I had about the perfect dress was that it would take me days and days and weeks if necessary to find it. I thought I would go from bridal shop to bridal shop, trying on an endless number of dresses while my friends sat in the next room eagerly waiting for me to come out in the dress so they could sigh awwwww and wipe a few tears from their faces. This myth was again quickly squashed with my actual experience. I understand for some girls, this actually happens and is not a myth for them, but seeing as I intend on getting married just once and I found my dress in the first shop I went into, it remains a myth for me.
We set the date for our wedding about 3 weeks after we got engaged. The wedding date was set for 8 months time. I assumed I had plenty of time. My parents are doing the bulk of the planning and all I needed to do was sort myself and the bridesmaids out and make sure my fiancé did the same. However, 8 months slowly turned into 7 months and I still did not have a dress. I had looked online to get an idea of what I wanted. I was so convinced I wanted a Justin Alexander dress as he seemed to be the only one that made dresses with decent sleeves that both I would like and that wouldn’t make my church in Nigeria send me packing when I got to the altar. You see, when getting married in Nigeria, one of the biggest pains is finding a dress that the vicar and Church folk will find acceptable. If its too short, too tight, or God forbid, reveals your delicate features, you will NOT be allowed to get married! I soon called a few bridal shops close to me to do a price check just to give me an idea of how much I should expect to spend. The one closest to me was £200 pounds more expensive than the second bridal shop I called. The second shop was also doing a January sale which meant if I ordered my dress or placed a deposit of £100 before the end of January, I would get another 10% off my purchase. Fantastic!
So I tried to book an appointment at the second bridal shop to find that the next 3 or 4 Saturdays were already booked! This was really frustrating: I mean, how many people are getting married really?! This meant that I had to take time off work to go and try on dresses. I went into the bridal shop with an open mind, consciously deciding to try on the Justin Alexander dress I thought I wanted last, just so I would not have a biased opinion on the other dresses. I picked a few dresses with sleeves which I thought looked nice on me and then the shop assistant suggested I tried on a boob tube wedding gown. My thoughts went to what my mum’s face would look like if she saw me in this, then to what the church would say and so on. However, once I’d tried on the boob tube dress, I could not deny the fact that it fitted perfectly and despite telling myself I was not going to buy a boob tube wedding dress because I wanted to be comfortable when I was dancing and didn’t want to worry about my boobs seeping out, I ended up buying a boob tube dress! On a few conditions though…
I expressed my worries to the shop assistant and she showed me all the support the dress had inside: a zip and 2 layers of buttons to keep me strapped in. Then, she showed me this beautiful jacket I could also wear on top of the dress (not like boleros, I’m not a huge fan of boleros). Unlike boleros, the jacket covered my chest and buttoned up at the back. The buttons matched my dress and basically the jacket looked like it was part of the dress. I was thrilled!
My joy was very short lived! I knew my mum wouldn’t understand if I tried to explain the dress and jacket to her. Once she heard boobtube, she would have switched off, so the plan was not to tell her. However, my dearest thought it would be a good idea to pass it through my mum so we could jump through all the hoops now. Let’s just say the conversation with my mum about the dress ended up in tears! And of course by then I had already paid a deposit for both the dress and jacket!
So I cancelled the jacket before it was too late, just until I figured out what I wanted to do. I knew for sure I wanted my beautiful dress but just passing it through my mum and church was going to be a problem. I spoke to my mum and then got my friend to go to my church with a picture of the jacket to ask the vicar’s wife if it was acceptable. The vicar’s secretary said NEVER! “The dress had to be long sleeved and we may even accept if it reaches your elbow!” When my friend told me, I just laughed and thought what a joker!
She eventually saw the vicar’s wife and apparently although my chest is modestly covered and they can’t see any cleavage whatsoever, the fact that they can see my arms is an issue, especially as they can see my armpits! So, I would need to add sleeves to the jacket. Sigh. At this point, I had wished I allowed my dad get his way so we would be getting married in England instead of jumping through these unnecessary hoops in Nigeria.
I resulted to calling my designer to ask if I could buy the exact same material the jacket was made from along with the dress. They said to ask my bridal shop to call them and they’d arrange something. For an extra £115 I now have a solution to cover my armpits. Hahaha! When my dress arrives, I’ll go for a fitting and the material should have also arrived by then. I’ll then decide what length of sleeve will suit my look.
I am slightly upset though… Oh well.. Its all for a good cause. As long as at the end of the day I’ll be married to my dearest, they can dress me in sacks all they want!
PS: Of course the jacket will be coming off at the reception 😉
PPS: I need to order my veil… Lacey? Long, short, medium length… None? Decisions decisions…
For Ladies Wot Brunch 
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